her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
