I wish I could teleport
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
