before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
two words: eviction party
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
