Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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