I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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