All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
