every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
