Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Alive.
So much puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Randomize