i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
