Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
