i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
