Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
