somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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