Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize