he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
