let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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