Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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