i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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