hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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