ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
