so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
This baby is an asshole
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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