OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
