Is it normal to miss your booty call?
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
