I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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