Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Randomize