I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I will pee on everything he values.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize