i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
