I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I'm too high and old for this...
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon