Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
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