I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize