Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
two words...techno handjob
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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