This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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