I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
i've created a new STD.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
