I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
