Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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