Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
