i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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