that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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