I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
