Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
