I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
