I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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