Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Randomize
