guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize