Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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