I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
