what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize