Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Fuck appropriateness.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
As shirtless as possible
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
