He managed to light the Jello on fire...
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
