I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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