It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
