She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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